Today was a great show to end on. I was more present, was mostly vocally healthy, and we got to tell our story! I could tell all our priorities were geared towards telling our tale, and that was a great feeling. Actors tell stories, and I never fully put it into a context that we were a wonderful cohort of storytellers until now.
Also, we got to push the turntable today!!!!! We got all the safety protocols in place and, once the house was clear, the cast took turns pushing the turntable (with the entire crew’s supervision). Niko managed to push it all by himself! We also got to keep our passports, which is awesome.
I am so thankful for being a part of this. This show was so rich and fulfilling, and it is probably the best storytelling I’ve ever done. I’ve come so far in this department, and I can’t help but think of something Sean Coady told me a while back. She said that I would find a place in this department. That I would find myself with people I can be myself around. That I could find myself carefree on and off stage. I wanted to believe her, but back then, I didn’t. She was right. It would happen.
Also, some cast members and I went to see The Haunting in Venice movie (another Poirot-verse film) in theatres. It was good, but most of the joy came from seeing how our characters fit in. Where does Ratchett/Mo fit in here? Haha, Poirot/Seth would totally do that. She is Hubbard/Maddie – 100%!
I can’t pretend even for a moment that this isn’t bittersweet. That I won’t have melancholic evenings or chuckle to myself about one of Seth/Poirot’s funny gestures. But the sadness I feel is matched by every group laugh, our hunt for little treats after rehearsal, or one of Marc’s snazzily coordinated outfits.
This show will leave a mark on me. It’s shown me I can be a storyteller. It helped me grow immensely as an actor. It proved to me that I not simply can, but have found the people who make me feel like I can be myself.
I am so proud of myself for coming this far. I’ll leave some sappiness for the summative statement, but I wish I could give sophomore Mason a hug and tell him he’d be alright. I guess I didn’t realize it until now, but this show (and being cast in True West :D) is my marker that everything I’ve worked for is here. I did it.
“Holy God!”
